Worst Party Comp Ever
Last night I was feeling more than a little out of it, or at least too out of it to actual do much of anything meaningful in Final Fantasy XIV. So after finishing my hunt quest and randoming my way into an Aery dungeon group… I opted to just log out for the night. For a period of time I considered simply going to sleep… and this is honestly the option I should have taken. The Four Job Fiesta is like a religion to my good friend Ashgar, and until the night before last I had not actually even registered for it officially. So as I sat there swaddled in a comfy blanket on the very comfy sofa… I opted to dig the xbox controller out of the console beside me and officially start my fiesta. The rest is history as I was up fairly late getting my start in the world. In past Fiestas my party comp has not been terribly horrible… or at the very least I have bought my way to freedom using the Jobfair donation system. This time however being I think my fourth year participating… I am just going to let it ride.
So when the game assigned me monk for my Wind job… I didn’t think much about it. I figured that would be an easy beginning to the game. When it gave me Berserker for my water job however… I started to dread this decision I had made. Then when I was assigned Beastmaster as my fire job… I realized this was going to be a really odd ride. I figure the answer to my freedom will once again be out level the content, and I have already gotten a start on that notion as I just defeated the Library of Ancients at level 21 which is about five levels or so off the normal pace I believe. Next time I play I will be going after my earth job.. and wondering if it will be salvation or another nail in the coffin on this horrible party. Admittedly I have never actually used the Beastmaster but I always hated how fiddly Gau was in Final Fantasy VI and never actually used him as a result. In theory this is going to be a return to that sort of thing, but I need to do some serious research on what all I need to do and when I need to do it, especially as I am just about to get an airship for the first time giving me a wider range of freedom to go off collecting abilities.
Chain Run Dungeons
In part the reason why I opted to log out last night instead of play is that I am sitting on a strange wall. Right now I am about half way to level 57 and I have a bunch of options on how to get there. I could go do all of the quests that I missed doing while skipping my way around the world and ignoring most of the side quests. I am sure that Square has intended me to level using these, and the fact that I am largely ignoring them is completely breaking their content design. I could always go join a FATE train somewhere, as this has always been a viable method of leveling especially now that so many people are doing it and there are almost always FATE groups in the party finder. It seems that Northern Thanalan is once again an active hotbed of FATE running, and in theory this would even be good experience for a Heavensward character. I am doing my daily hunts but they are honestly more for the currency provided and while they each provide a decent chunk of experience… there are far better and quicker ways to get it.
All of these are completely viable options, but I would far rather just run a bunch of dungeons. The problem is that my preference will always be to run dungeons with the Greysky Armada folks. Unfortunately they are either quiet about what they need for dungeons, or have not unlocked a given dungeon yet. I’ve run a few groups a night for the last several nights, but if I am going to rely on dungeons as a means of leveling I am going to have to step out into the larger community and just start random queuing. Now we get into the dilemma last night… I could have tanked a run for the guild, but I did not have the presence of mind to do so with strangers. Don’t get me wrong I love the FFXIV community, but dealing with anyone that I don’t already know inflicts a mental toll on me. My default and original state is that of an introvert… and over the years I have forced myself to be more extroverted… but doing so… drains me. Last night I was an energizer bunny that had wound down, but tonight hopefully I will begin chaining dungeons once more in order to get the last of my level so I can move forward in the story again and hopefully unlock dungeon four.
Unusually Trying Week
Not really sure why but this week has been a really rough one for some reason. In part I think it is because at the start of the week I had to deal with the being alone, as my wife was once again travelling. Thankfully only for a few days and as of Wednesday she should be home for the rest of the summer. It just seems like everything has been stressing me out far more than it should. I labored over the decision to go ahead and cancel the World of Warcraft account, just to keep it from auto renewing. I have stressed over a dozen different small issues at work, and I have been stressed that I no longer have the ability to do everything in Final Fantasy XIV. Right now I am a tank… and if the group already has one of those it means I have to sit out and watch from the bench as the group goes off and has fun. I liked that I could work my way into any group and fill whatever slot they happened to need, because in truth… running things with my guild is always the thing that I love to do the most.
The problem is that I will get there once again, but there is an almost insurmountable amount of leveling standing in the way. I have this odd relationship with grinding… I enjoy it, but only when I don’t realize it is there. If I am grinding towards a goal of some sort… then I realize how much work is going to be needed to get to where I want to go… and simply start to shut down. When I am just grinding as part of my default state of running around and attacking everything in sight… it becomes a happy and carefree place instead. The problem being that right now I know the end goal… and for whatever reason I am having trouble compartmentalizing and ignoring the finish line. I think I am just wired strangely… because so long as I don’t know where the finish line is I will keep pushing ahead blindly until I finally accomplish whatever it was that I wanted to accomplish. However once I know where the boundaries are, and what it is going to take to get there… the game changes and in a strange way goal setting de-motivates me. So long as I am on this fun romp of discovery, life is grand… but right now I need to somehow figure out how to ignore the goals and go back to playing everything for sheer enjoyment.