Flamebending for Fun

Serious Time with Bel

This morning I am going to break from my normally positive fluffy posts to talk about something fairly serious.  Hopefully you will bear with me, because it is a topic I believe strongly about.  A few days ago my good friend Jaedia crafted an excellent post talking about her frustrations and outright anger with sexual objectification especially in video game culture.  This sparked an interesting discussion among both the women and men on my twitter feed, and I personally ended up rebroadcasting it twice for emphasis.  Over the years I have watched as my female friends have had to constantly battle everything from largely harmless statements to the downright creepy and dangerous.  What happens time and time again is there is this thread where folks are discussing a specific topic… and then out of the blue some guy will make a comment inappropriately off topic.  Then almost by queue it happened to this very discussion.

objectivization_youpretty I’ve decided to mosaic the information about the person and the participants in the discussion to attempt their anonymity.  Granted you can scroll through my feed and likely find out who this is about, but in truth I don’t think the guy in question meant any real harm by it.  The problem is it was just tragically timed, and interrupting a conversation about objectification.  Essentially he was being the poster child of this thing that everyone was talking about being frustrated about…  IN the discussion about it.  When I called him out on it, he immediately got defensive which is exactly the wrong action to take.  If someone calls you out on something in regards to something that is making another person uncomfortable…  your reaction should be to re-evaluate this action you just took, not to mount a defense against the “slander”.

objectivization_hisdefense After a mountain of back and forth, of Jae and I trying to explain what exactly the transgression was, we get down to the real root of the problem.  He quite literally did not care what the conversation was about, and instead felt the need to chime in with his comment.  There is this ingrained feeling of the divine right to pass judgment on the appearance of others, made worse by the thought that they should do it against the context of the current conversation.  The comment that was made was completely harmless and in the right context would have been perfectly acceptable.  However I have seen this play out time and time again…  Female friend posts a serious topic, and guys below comment about how pretty she is.  Do you not realize just how creepy that seems?  The guy in question apparently did not, and he spent awhile raging that we were picking on him for having a penis, completely missing the point.  My hope is that by posting about this others might think twice  before they interrupt the context of a conversation to essentially objectify the speaker with something completely off topic.

Flamebending for Fun

WoWScrnShot_021715_201626 Last week was a rough week for our raid.  We had several people out with the death flu and as a result quite literally half of our healing corp was absent.  Early in the day on Thursday it sounded like we were not actually going to raid.  After talking to our raid lead, he told me not to worry about rushing home… and instead went out to eat with my wife and ran a few errands.  When I got home they were knee deep in Highmaul and I am uncertain what the final results of it were.  As a result of not raiding since last Tuesday I was looking forward to hopefully getting back into Blackrock Foundry and making some forward momentum.  We started the evening by taking down Hans and Franz.  There are a lot of moving parts in that fight, and some RNG elements…  but ultimately on our third attempt we got our second kill in the books.  My luck with loot in Blackrock was not going to hold however, as I walked away with double gold.

The rest of the evening we spent working on the boss directly after Hans and Franz…  Flamebender Ka’graz.  She essentially is a blademaster, and as we know blademasters are good at two things…  fire based attacks and spinning weapons.  There are a bunch of things going on in the fight, the first is dealing with the placement of her flame slash attacks, which draw giant lines from the boss to the edge of the room and will target players outside of melee range.  The next problem child is two flame wolves that act much the same as Corehounds in that you have to dps them down within a few minutes of each other, otherwise they will re-ignite the other hound.  The last really frustrating attack is that she does a massive room wide fire AOE that players need to stack up for and heal through.  We managed to make some solid progress on her, but for whatever reason could not seem to get all the moving parts together.  On our best try we managed to get her down to around 30% I believe, but the healing on this fight and the placement of objects ends up with us slowly bleeding players until we simply do not have enough to finish the battle.  My hope is with some more research we can come in Thursday and wreck her.

Attempting Neverwinter

GameClient 2015-02-18 06-31-00-46 If you remember a few days ago I had a post talking about the three games that I would like to revisit.  One of them was Neverwinter by Cryptic now Perfect World, so after the raid I fired it up rather than what has become my more recent winding down game…  Guild Wars 2.  All told I played around 45 minutes of the game, and it was roughly how I remembered it.  There are positives about it and negatives…  the most glaring is this feeling that everything you actually want is somehow locked behind a confusing two tier currency system.  You have Astral Diamonds and you have Zen… and the two do very similar functions.  The problem is it feels absolutely arbitrary which currency is used for which thing.  Since I was a preorder I got a large quantity of Astral Diamonds, but it seems like the main function of them is to speed up tasks like training your companion.  All of the useful unlocks and content walls seem to be purchased with Zen.  That whole mess pretty much guarantees that I would never play this game seriously.

What I was surprised by was how fun the actual dungeons were.  Granted I didn’t run a “real” five man dungeon last night, but I did do one of the many lairs that the storyline weaves you in and out of.  The one I completed was some sort of orc barracks, and considerably larger than the ones I remember.  There were no less than three boss fights, and several hidden treasure chests.  The only thing that I really disliked about the gameplay was the fact that health did not regenerate.  It was something that I could get used to, but it is just so against the norm of the games I play normally.  In fact I stood around waiting for awhile waiting before I realized that my health was not coming back at all…  at which point I remembered that I had to use health pots.  Mechanically the game is interesting, but I still have the same opinion.  Elder Scrolls online just does the action combat style better.  That said there is a wealth of player generated content, so more than likely I will be spending my time exploring that.

Playing Catch Up

Battle Bards Episode 45 – Rock On!

This segment is going to be a little bit odd, because at the time of me writing it the episode has not officially gone live.  However I only post once daily, and as such I really would like to get a plug out there for the show.  In saying this, the links I am about to post will not go live until 9 am so I will be embargoing my post this morning which is an odd experience for me.  On February 7th I had the privilege of sitting in as a guest host on the Battle Bards podcast with the illustrious Syp and Syl.  To make things even kookier, they told me that I needed to pick a topic.  I went back and forth on a few topics and finally landed upon rock themes in MMO games.  Traditionally MMOs seem to have the same auditory palate of instruments and themes.  Every now and then however there is a soundtrack that abandons the traditional and brings in some rock guitar.  Over the course of the show we focused on these tracks, and I believe it was Syp that finally gave the show its title of “Rock On!”.

I had an absolute blast recording the show, and would be more than willing to step in again if they ever had need of me.  Now onwards with the show information.

Episode 45 show notes

  • Intro (featuring “Blue Turns to Greyfrom Tabula Rasa, “Battle on the Big Bridge Reborn” from FFXIV, and “Prologue” from Castlevania SOTN)
  • “Titan Battle Theme” from FFXIV
  • “Alonewolf” from Rusty Hearts
  • “Toko” from Granado Espada
  • “Character Select/Map Load” from Heroes of the Storm
  • “New Conglomerate Main Theme” from PlanetSide 2
  • “Malicia’s Finale” from DDO
  • “Lucid Dreaming” from Aion
  • What track did we like the best?
  • Mail from Akiranon
  • Outro

Listen to episode 45 now!

Giving Levels Away

gw036 Last night I managed to hit level 71 in Guild Wars 2 and absolutely thought I would never actually get there.  In truth I would not have gotten there were it not for the fact that the game seems to be giving away levels every time I turn around.  At some point they added the Tome of Knowledge into the game, and double clicking them item grants you one instant level.  I am not sure if I am exceptionally lucky, but I seem to be pulling these left and right out of various bags and containers.  Last night from my daily login reward chest I pulled two of them for example.  I think my meteoric rise in levels is really two fold.  First they keep giving me levels, but secondly it seems like everything is quite simply worth a lot more experience.  I did a level and a half over the last few days dinking around and completing a level 5 starter zone.  I still have about half of the objectives in that zone to go, so I am enjoying the fact that it doesn’t actually seem to matter what I am out in the world doing…  just that I am doing something.

At this point I can honestly picture getting up a few more characters, because right now this game seems to be the ideal winding down practice for me.  We finished our Final Fantasy XIV raid around 9:30 pm, and I played Guild Wars 2 for another thirty minutes or so after that.  At which point I felt relaxed and ready to go to sleep, which has always been a problem for me after any raid experience.  When you have been doing exciting things, you have this surplus supply of adrenaline flowing through you, and for me at least I need something much more relaxing to work through all of that.  While Guild Wars 2 may never be destined to be my primary game, I am really appreciating its worth in the role it is playing.  I am curious to see what life at 80 is going to be like, but I have a feeling that ultimately I will just end up switching to an alt so I can continue the slow paced progression.  If nothing else I think it would be pretty awesome to 100% the map.

Playing Catch Up

ffxiv 2015-02-16 21-00-32-31

Monday night is traditionally our more serious raiding night in Final Fantasy XIV with Saturday being a sort of anything goes experience.  However since last night we had a number of players hung up on key steps to the main story and other things… we opted to do a grand “catch up” night.  We started the evening by knocking out the Battle of Big Bridge for Neph, which is always an extremely fun experience.  That is one of those fights that I happily do every single time anyone needs it because getting to play with Gilgamesh is always a treat.  From there we knocked out the Dhrome Chimera fight because that was the step Neph happened to be hung up on for her Relic.  I remember the first time we did this fight, it took the full raid timer, because quite honestly back then it was a massive challenge.  However since then a method of pulling the Chimera out of the cave has become popular and this makes the fight immensely easier.  Also the fact that I am insanely over geared helps as well.  In any case we got the fight completed quickly and Neph moved on to the next step in her relic chain.

ffxiv 2015-02-16 21-18-32-87 The bulk of the evening was spent working on the Chrysalis trial.  This is the road block placed in the path of completing the 2.5 main story arc addition.  I don’t want to go into too much detail about the fight, namely because I don’t want to provide any spoilers.  There are a couple of places in the fight there where things shift drastically, and you have to begin dealing with a new mechanic.  In truth the fight felt like a bit of a remix of some of the raid encounters.  There were elements of several fights from the Crystal Tower series especially.  I think it took us about five tries to get through the encounter, but I have to say the whole experience was extremely fun.  That is one of the best things about Final Fantasy XIV is that their boss encounters are extremely solid.  After defeating it, and each of us making it through the cut scene we had around twenty minutes left to do something.  As a result we grabbed Solaria and opted to help her get through the Leviathan primal encounter.  It was a night of lots of objectives being checked off, and a night of many fun battles.

Games I Want to Revisit

Tomorrow morning is going to be what seems like a frosty one.  So I am once again cheating and writing a blog post the night before I intend on posting it.  I assume in the morning I will need to spend all of my available time scraping windows and warming cars to make sure we can get in safely.  Lately I have been poking my head around Guild Wars 2, a game that I had until Pax South completely written off as “not for me”.  Since then I have reached a point of peace with the game, and actually found that I am enjoying it quite a bit.  So this morning my post will be a revisiting of games that I would like to give a second or third chance.

Star Wars: The Old Republic

swtor 2014-05-05 21-28-00-26 Star Wars: The Old Republic has the dubious honor of being quite possibly the worst possible free to play conversion I have ever experienced.  If I did not know any better, it might be absolutely functional for a new player.  That said having played the game in release and realizing just how gimped the game is without spending a lot of money, infuriates me.  Essentially I cannot bring myself to play this game without actually paying for a subscription.  I have attempted to play this game a few times since release, but never for terribly long.  My last voyage into the game was to try and play a Sith Juggernaut, since I had not really experienced much of the dark side content.  When our guild was actually playing regularly I managed to level a Jedi Guardian, Jedi Shadow, and a Trooper Vanguard…  so yes all three available tanks.  When I finally left the game I was slowly working on leveling my Chiss Smuggler.

Since then they have released several expansions each with their own story extensions.  I feel like maybe I am missing something having not seen any of this content.  That was the one thing above all else that really excelled with The Old Republic, was that the traditional Bioware story was excellent.  This weekend on the podcast we talked a bit about Kodra’s experiences with the smuggler storyline, and I have to say I got those pangs of remorse in my stomach for never having experienced it.  On top of this, there is still so much content Sith side that I have never actually seen.  The problem that I ran into the last time I played was that the questing just felt so repetitive.  These quests are very much World of Warcraft Wrath of the Lich King era in the way they are constructed.  While the storyline itself is excellent, it just felt tiring to keep trying to push through the planets.  Still all of this said… I feel like I should give it another shot.

Lord of the Rings Online

lotro Lord of the Rings Online and I have a strange relationship.  I never actually played this at launch, but during one of my many breaks with World of Warcraft I joined some friends playing it.  There are things I love about this game, and then there are things that frustrate me.  I love the community of this game, almost more than I like the game itself.  Landroval is an amazing place, and there are so many times I find myself wandering around Bree listening to player created concerts rather than actually completing content.  I’ve never been successful at trying to play this game for free, so ultimately I end up subscribing to remove the roadblocks.  There is just so much content that I have yet to experience.  Last time I played I had just made it to the Trollshaws, which I think is in my late 30s.  I greatly enjoy the Champion as far as a class goes, and found it really enjoyable to solo.  Which was super important because I have never really found a stable group playing this game.

I follow so many blog of players devoted to LoTRO and I have to say I feel like somewhat of a failure that I have never had a max level character there.  As such it sits in a unique place as far as regrets go for me.  I am sure I will end up reinstalling this game at some point, and poking my head back there to give it another go.  It has been I think two years since I last tried to play, and since then I am sure quite a bit more content has been released.  The game is full of so many special moments of nostalgia for followers of the book series.  The above picture is from Weathertop, one of these early “oh my god I am actually standing here” moments in these games.  I just wish I could clone myself and play all the games I want to play at the same time.

Neverwinter Online

GameClient 2013-05-07 06-52-12-08 When this game was released I played off and on during the first week… and then never set foot in it again.  The biggest problem I had was that while the game was a good action rpg…  Elder Scrolls Online was simply a better one.  In the weeks since joining open beta for Neverwinter and the ultimate release…  I was let into the double super secret alpha testing program for ESO.  So all of the time and devotion I would have spent playing Neverwinter, I instead poured into the alpha testing program for ESO.  As such I feel like I never really actually gave this game a chance.  I enjoyed the Guardian Fighter quite a bit, and it was an excellent mix of tank and brawler giving me the ability to do damage with my favored sword and shield.  Again the biggest problem is that I was trying to compare it to the Dragonknight Sword and Shield that I was playing in Elder Scrolls Online and Neverwinter just coming up short.

What interests me about potentially going back is the fact that not only is there official content waiting on me, there is an absolutely insane amount of player created content.  My friend Tipa from West Karana blog, has seemingly done an amazing job of recreating some of the nostalgic content from the original Everquest with the Neverwinter foundry toolset.  At some point I really want to go in and experience this first hand.  The biggest thing holding me back is the fact that firstly, I am not really sure if I can remember my account information.  Secondly Perfect World has never given me the warmest of fuzzies, and I’ve always found some of their practices to be a week bit sketchy.  Even taking these into consideration I am sure at some point I will reinstall this game and give it another go.  There is just too much left there to experience that I have not seen at all.

The Monkeysphere

AggroChat 44 – Tragic Relationships

As we were getting close to recording this weeks episode two things happened.  Firstly we decided that it was probably better for all parties combined if we tried to record on Friday instead of Valentines day proper, that would leave the day open for any holiday plans that our cast might have.  Secondly Kodra suggested that we try and record a Valentines episode talking about relationships in video games.  At face value this seemed like a great idea, and generally speaking even if an idea is destined to fail… I am more than willing to try it.  The problem is as we sat down to record, we quickly realized just how flawed and tragic most relationships in video games are.  We can’t even make it past three relationships in the episode without hitting in the fact that man…  video games are really bad at this.

The problem is that video games seem to be good at two emotions revenge fueled Rage, and utter soul crushing Sadness.  We joked about indie games being hung up on sadness a few episodes ago when Tam kept giving each game Kodra talked a sadness score “Seven Sads out of Ten”.  It seems as though we are not quite ready to talk about actual adult relationships that are productive and not abusive or hostile to the well being of the participants.  I think the problem is more that we have not figured out how to do meaningful stories that are not relying on these elements as a way of moving the plot forward.  After all if someone is happy with their life, chances are they are not going to go off and be and adventurer.  In any case the episode ended up being pretty interesting to record in spite of itself.

The Monkeysphere

TheBelSphere Yesterday Braxwolf wrote an interesting follow up to my post diving into my post and trying to explain some of his own thoughts.  His post was awesome for a number of reasons, not the least of which was the fact that it gave me a real name to a theory that I have used for years.  Once upon a time I was driving home and heard some researchers talking on NPR about the “monkeysphere” theory…  well it turns out this is more properly known as the Dunbar number.  Essentially it is the maximum number of people that we can care about at one time.  The idea is that our brains are literally only capable of caring about a fixed number of people at any given time, so in order to start caring about someone knew… we have to punt someone out of the sphere.  I’ve long thought about this and I think my zone of caring maybe works a little different than the extreme examples of these studies.

While I am not sure if my sphere is larger than most, but I think it is arranged in some distinct regions.  I attempted to draw these out above, to make sense of them.  If you take that 150 is the maximum number of people that you can care about at any time like the initial study I read, my numbers would break down to something like this.  I generally have about 25 people that I would consider my inner circle, and these are folk that maintain their orbit relatively safely and I ultimately end up talking to them almost every single day.  After that we fall into a close orbit zones of folks I would consider close friends, and among this group I would say there are about 50.  From there you fall into what I refer to as the “hotswap” zone, to borrow a term from technology.  This would be a field of 75 people that gets swapped in and out of the larger pool of every single person I have ever met.

Points of Data

Each person that I meet gets stored in my brain as a pattern of data…  the closer I am to a person the more data points I remember.  The odd thing is… when someone moves in and out of orbit I don’t delete that data.  I can remember things about friends that I have not seen in years and may never actually cross paths with again.  Essentially I feel like I have a fourth sphere that is made up of the thousands and thousands of people I have ever met in my life.  At any time due to circumstance one of these people can come zooming into orbit and bump someone else out of that “hotswap” zone and I can functionally pick up where I left off, as though no time had passed.  I realize that not everyone functions in this state of constantly looking for new interactions with people, and pulling them into their own personal gravity for as long as possible.  But that is the way I work, as some sort of empathic computer looking for new inputs.

The biggest flaw in my system design however is the fact that there is no delete key.  When a group of individuals break out of orbit attempting to shun me…  there is no system available to write those individuals off as a “loss” and purge them from my memory.  The sting of rejection will always be there, even after decades pass..  it can be summoned up on a whim with brilliant Technicolor realism.  I can remember every disappointment, every failure, every time someone made fun of me.  Which seems horrible until you realize that I can also remember every single positive event that has happened to me, each warm fuzzy felt and recalled at a moments notice.  The problem is…  this makes it extremely hard to ever truly forgive someone.  I can reach a point of “being able to exist amicably” with someone, but I can never actually forget any of the transgressions… and in the back of my head will always end up holding a grudge.  So having this deep empathic memory…  is a double edged sword, but I would not change the way I function for anything.