Tales of the Aggronaut

AARP: Loved by Children Everywhere

December 24, 2013 by Belghast

Star Trek Fashions

I am getting a far later start this morning in blogging. I warned my twitter followers that my morning post would end up being an afternoon post, but since this gets syndicated on all the platforms… apologies to the rest of you who were expecting a post early. Why did it get delayed you might ask? Well we had to get up and around and get some last minute things done. Thankfully the activities gave me what I refer to as “blog fodder”. Be warned I am not exactly going on chronological order here, but bear with me.

Firstly… I know that geeks are sexy, or at least that is what the media keeps telling me. That said… when did it become cool for women to look like Star Trek: The Next Generation? I realize that the recent movies were blockbusters of serious magnitude. I did now however expect Star Trek fashion to trickle out into the mainstream. The above shirts are from Cato, one of the places we stopped this morning looking for various sundry items. Actually we went there to buy an item they no longer have… but that isn’t really important. What is important is I cannot get the image of a Star Trek uniform out of my head when looking at these shirts.

To the right is a similar dress that I found earlier in the season at Target. If you follow me on twitter or G+ I am sure you saw me post it. If not here it is in all of its TNG glory. If Data were female she would totally be sporting this dress. Then again the more I think about it… none of the women on TNG wore dresses at all, but instead got the unisex jumpsuits everyone else wore. I guess you would have to go back to the classic series or the reboot movies to find dresses at all. The trend however may not be entirely limited to Star Trek. I cannot see the t-shirt on the right without thinking Boba Fett.

Granted these could just be hallucinations as I have spent more time of late in clothing stores than I would ever care to. My wife has been on this mission to look “more put together”, and she has gone through a similar physical transition as I have losing almost 50 lbs. I completely support whatever goals she happens to have, but I find myself extremely bored most of the time and when I get bored my mind wanders. As a result I am probably just trying to make these things into something more palatable. I have been having to draw on my art school background in helping her pick out things that “go together” without strictly matching. I keep having to remind my wife that the experience is not nearly as exciting for me as it is for her.

AARP: Loved by Children Everywhere

Another jaunt of this morning while we were out and about was to go by and get our hair cut. For me it had been extremely long and I was looking rather scruffy. To be truthful I cannot tell you exactly when I last got it cut. We went to our normal place and signed up on the list, waiting for a friend of ours to get free. Personally it is worth the wait for Mandy, who is extremely popular… in part because I can simply say “make me look presentable” and that means something to her. She translates well, and I find the ability invaluable… and since I tend to go extremely late I always feel like I need to leave her an extremely good tip.

While waiting there, I got to watch an entire family getting their hair cut. The parents didn’t really look old enough to have three kids, but honestly that was the least of my worries. You would think if one parent was getting their hair cut, the other one would be in the waiting room corralling the kids. This however was not on their radar at all. They sat back talking to the beautician and bellowing command rather ineffectually at their offspring that were roaming around the waiting room and generally running amok.

I don’t remember exactly which of the kids began this, but they found their way to the basket of magazines sitting beside my wife and I. Each of them picked out a magazine carefully, and when it came time for the youngest girl she took extra care. She rifled through the basket tossing aside several magazines before arriving at her prize. When she took up she held lovingly clasped in her hands a copy of AARP Magazine. The look of beaming pride on her face only made the scene all that more hilarious. It was all I could do to keep from laughing.

The magazines however didn’t hold their attention long. It was only a matter of minutes until they were back running around the waiting room in a big circle. I am not sure what exactly happened but next time I looked up the littlest one was sitting in the floor crying. I am guessing that she could not keep up with the rough housing and got knocked down. It was only when there were tears flowing that the absentee parents finally paid enough attention to bark additional orders at their kinder. I realize I am a non-parent, and I am that way by choice… but I would like to think that if I did have kids I would actually pay some manner of attention to them.

Home At Last

I am finally back home and wrapped back up in my cocoon. Since the weight loss I have been inordinately colder natured, and as a result I now have a fuzzy blanket wrapped around my backside and another fuzzy blanket laid over top of me. It makes it a pain in the ass to get up off the couch but man is it nice and toasty warm. This of course is along with my flanel pants. and thermal henley… I am maybe overdressed for the fact that we do have heat. I am not sure what is on the radar today. I have various sundry betas that I could be playing, or I could just hop into World of Warcraft once the servers come back up. I am assuming they did maintenance today, however since it is Christmas Eve I am not sure if that would be the case.

Speaking of Christmas… I will be posting tomorrow like normal, but if you are too busy with your own family to read my blog… I want to take the time right now to wish you all a very Merry Christmas. Most of the time I feel like I am talking to myself here, but I am constantly surprised at just how many loyal readers I have. You all mean the world to me, and while I would probably keep blogging even if I had no audience at all… you make me feel far less crazy in this endeavor. I hope you all have a great holiday tomorrow, and that you are blanketed by loved ones. We will be travelling a bit, but will not be terribly far from home. Here is hoping the next few days are joyous… or at the very least tolerable.

I Hate People

December 23, 2013 by Belghast

Plans are a Crutch

I had these plans yesterday of running the last part of Siege of Orgrimmar, but didn’t actually do that at all. I queued for it at one point, but after seeing it would take an hour I bailed and gave up. After being iced in for several days, we were out of a few things… not the least of which was toilet paper and paper towels. The above picture is to show the extent of the icing… for years I have gotten in the habit of raising my wiper blades so they don’t get frozen to the window. As you can see it is like everything had been sealed in plastic to preserve it for eternity. If nothing else I knew I had to clear the vehicles so we could leave if we absolutely needed to.

It actually did not take as long as I expected. I went outside in my pajamas and started my jeep, then went back inside to take a shower and get ready for the morning. When I got back out the heater inside and engine had managed to warm the ice up enough to where I could start breaking it off rather easily. Roughly 20 minutes later I had cleared my Jeep and was headed back inside to let my wife’s vehicle warm up. I could barely feel my fingers… but it was at least clear. When I cleared my wife’s vehicle I had the foresight to actually wear gloves.

We made it out of the house pretty easily, and I have to say this is the weirdest ice storm I have ever experienced. Everything is absolutely coated in a layer of ice… the trees, the vehicles, the grass, anything elevated even slightly off the ground. However the roads are almost completely dry. It is like the perfect ice storm… all of the pretty with none of the consequences. Granted some parts of the city are out of power as the ice snapped powerlines… so they would definitely question my assessment of no consequences. All in all however it could be been and likely should have been much worse.

I Hate People

I mean this in the nicest possible way… but I hate people. When you put me in a room with more than a half a dozen people a severe fight or flight instinct triggers. Now imagine how that instinct multiplies when you put me in a busy store during the holidays filled with hundreds of people. I am generally pretty good at swallowing down that feeling, but the more stores you expose me to… the more of an asshole I become. I am thankful that my wife realizes this because by the time we reached the last two stores of the day I am sure I was an absolute bear to be around. We had several things still to pick up on our list, so while we were out and about… and since we were both going a little stir crazy we decided to try and knock as many things off the list as possible.

Target was both the worst and the best place we went all afternoon. It was the worst because it was inanely busy and as I rounded the corner near the seasonal area… the instinct kicked in harder than it has in years. There was this huge zombie-like shambling mass of people migrating back and forth between toys and electronics. I gave up on any notion that I was going to go check the Lego isle and got out of there as soon as possible. It became a logistical exercise to even navigate my shopping cart through the narrow passages left by gawking customers. I suddenly realized why a lost child just sits down and cries… because at that point I seriously did feel like surrendering to the hopelessness that was all of those people pressing in on me.

That was the worst part… the best part however is just how efficiently they were managing the checkouts. They had roped off the area in front of the cash registers and while this caused the line to snake all the way down to the pharmacy area, it did make it move faster. They had a worker acting like a traffic cop to funnel people down the little shoots and to the next waiting cashier. Additionally they gave us a 10% discount as an apology for the whole credit card fiasco. Since we were actually hit during that event… I felt like we had more than earned it. Last weekend my discover card was off in Oklahoma City and Norman making purchases without me… and we are assuming since we still have our credit cards… it is tied to the whole Target event.

I probably would have gone postal at some point during yesterday, but we went to eat at Monterry, a Mexican chain restaurant we go to regularly. When I say regularly… I mean it, because the waitresses know our order by heart and often times fight over who is going to wait on us. Yesterday we had Daisy, who is extremely awesome and has the same pen fetish that my wife does. Over the time we have been going there, we have become rather social with them… and eating there act like a reset of my buffer. It was a happy place that helped me cope with the madness that was stores like Old Navy. Still by the time we ended our tour at Big Lots, I was so far past going that I am sure I was acting like an ass.

Relaxing with Friends

Yesterday before the madness began, I noticed that my good friend Vernie had managed to hit 90 on his mage. I did my normal song and dance about how awesome the Timeless Isle was for catching up, but as a very squishy class it seemed that soloing out there was just not something viable. We made tentative plans for me to grab one of my characters and help him get some gear after I got back from the holiday craziness. It was shortly after I got home that he logged back in and we did just that. At first I tried to use Exeter my paladin, but I quickly realized that I already had gotten the weekly chests when I swam him out to get the chest in the pirate cave. I grabbed Belgarou my druid, because I knew I had not really played him in a few weeks.

It turns out that this was a great call as I ran out of leather some time ago and could greatly use a run to replenish it. We faffed about the island for several hours and in the process we managed to get him Helm, Chest, Bracers, Belt, Gloves, Back, Legs, Ring and Trinket. Which in itself was a pretty amazing haul for our first outing. He had not really played since Cataclysm, so there are a ton of systems that simply did not exist back then. The big one is the LFR system, so as we hunted for gear on the island we queued for Mogushan Vaults. The queue was surprisingly short and we managed to make it through the three boss raid in extremely quick time.

I guess the game did not want him to have an unrealistic view of how the LFR system worked, because when we queued up for the second part of the raid… it went horribly. Someone pulled the boss too quickly, the tanks had no clue what they were doing… and we wiped. Moments after the wipe the raid just disintegrated in a matter of seconds. I told him that sadly that was also extremely common. While we waited for that raid to officially die we went out to Dinosaur Island… or more properly Isle of Giants. We had zero luck in both pets and eggs, but we killed quite a few and I got some more leather. I am not sure if it was in the first raid or the second… but at some point Vernie managed to pick up shoulders.

During the course of our faffing about he managed to go from 450 something to 474 and if we can get him a few more upgrades he should be able to start doing Throne of Thunder…. which I think is one of the more enjoyable instances of the expansion. After we finished the second raid, that went surprisingly successfully. Elegon managed to eat a half dozen people to the “floor boss”, but all in all we pulled out a win. Will of the Emperor was a wipe at first, namely because the tanks didn’t really know what they were doing. However someone luckily explained to them and we managed to pull that victory out as well. All in all it was a really fun night, and I was happy that we got Vernie a ton of upgrades in the process. Once again Faffing about pays off.

Beatstick Acquired

December 22, 2013 by Belghast

Ice Ice Baby

We are still functionally iced in, at least in the way that everything outside is coated in a thick layer of ice… including both vehicles. This has been the weirdest storm however as it has clung to everything but the concrete. Additionally the temperatures have remained at just the right place to keep the ice from melting. This means for the most part the roads are completely fine. It is just lack of caring that has kept us in the house. By the manifest restlessness upstairs from my wife, I have a feeling this is coming to an end today. We honestly need to get out and about to pick up the last few gifts in order to be done for the holidays.

Right now on twitter, I have the name “Belgrinch Stole Xmas” and to some extent it is not just clever use of my existing naming convention. I tend to be a big of a humbug when it comes to the holidays. Over the years bad things seem to fall near the holidays, and when you combine that with the fact that Christmas as an adult is a massive let down if you don’t have children. My wife and I have not put up a tree in over a decade. For children, Christmas still is a magical time but for me I just see the hassle of having to run between four households and shop for a bunch of people you literally only see once a year. I wish so much we could make Christmas be Thanksgiving 2.0.

Thanksgiving is pretty much my ideal holiday. People get together to share a meal together, and there is no expectations past that. You just have some good food, good conversation and then everyone goes on their merry ways. Instead we have an awkward exchange of time as everyone tries to avoid the inevitable gift exchanges. This year because of my aunt’s dialysis the timing is all messed up. Normally we do all of this on Christmas eve, but instead this year everything is pretty tentative. We considered going up tomorrow so we could just spend time with the family members we want to without the rest of the three ring circus. For me it is about spending time with my parents and my grandmother… past that it just gets progressively more and more awkward. Namely I am trying to avoid being around my bigoted uncles as they seriously destroy what little inner peace I have… and make me feel absolutely dirty for being around them.

Beatstick Acquired

I have chronicled the hunt for one-handed weapons over the last few weeks. My guildies and I have been running daily Heroic Scenarios for a shot at the 516 weapons that can drop there. Additionally I have been working my way through both Throne of Thunder and Siege of Orgrimmar. Yesterday I spent most of the day queued for the various ToT dungeons that have a chance of dropping a weapon. Turns out the in game loot advisor thingy doesn’t list everything. It seems there is a series of weapons that can drop off every single boss in the instance, and after killing Jinrohk yesterday I managed to get one of them. The mace pictured above is Zeeg’s Ancient Kegsmasher and comes from that list of alternative drops. While not ideal, I wish it was a 2.6 speed weapon and not the awkward 2.4 speed… but it is better than what I had and I am extremely happy to get it.

Additionally I managed to get through the Underhold section of Siege of Orgrimmar which unlocks The Downfall and a shot at another one-hander off of the Klaxxi council event. I am honestly not sure what it is about Underhold, but every single group I would get into would spontaneously disintegrate shortly after finishing Malkorok. There always seems to be either a mass exodus immediately after finishing the boss, or after failing that first time to Spoils of Pandaria. Last night… fairly late… I actually managed to find a group that oneshot every single encounter there… including captain lunchmeats himself… Thok. I won’t lie, I am not sure if I will actually ever queue for Underhold again unless a guild member needs it for something. The queue is around an hour generally, and with the lacklustre success rate it seems like a bundle of frustration I can simply live without.

Christmas Gifts Abound

So I am bad at this… let me start out by saying that up front. My intent in this section is not to be “look what soandso go me, neener neener” so you are going to see some thank yous, without me actually listing who they are directed to. I figure the people read my blog and they will know it is heart felt and directed at them. First up someone very awesome got me Talisman Prologue from my steam list. This is a game that I have thought about picking up so many times in the past but never pulled the trigger. I love the Talisman board game, and even the crappy american version that Milton Bradley released called Hero’s Quest. Despite how much frustration I have built up over the years… I am still a massive fanboy for Games Workshop and Talisman seems to be one of their purest gaming experiences. Really looking forward to seeing how well the digital version translates.

I am a massive sucker for the sandboxy shooter experience. Everything I have heard from friends and read has said that Farcry 3 really takes this whole concept up a notch. As a result this is one of those titles I have almost bought half a dozen times. But thanks to another amazing friend the decision was made for me. Again I plan on devoting some of my two weeks of downtime to exploring this game. Quite honestly… I have stuff on my steam wishlist as more of a reminder to myself, and because steam emails you when one of those titles goes on sale. I never in a million years expected anyone to buy me something off of it. Thank you guys very much, it made me feel loved.

Last but definitely not least… the League of Legends Mystery Gift madness is back in full swing again. For those of you who are not indoctrinated, you can send a friend a random skin for one of the champions they have. The price is 450 RP but you are guaranteed to get a skin that is of higher value, but it will be assigned completely at random. The coolest part about it is there is a chance of getting skins that have long been retired or for whatever reason removed from the game. One of the skins I have always wanted but never picked up is Chosen Master Yi. Who doesn’t want to play as a Jedi Knight? Huge thanks to another good friend for sending me a mystery box and giving me this awesome skin.

Caroling in Ulduar

December 21, 2013 by Belghast

Tis the Season

It is that time of the year when we naturally reflect upon what was good and not so good from the previous year. I myself am planning a post like this in the not so distant future. However this blurb is not about that at all. Yesterday the amazing Queen of Faff, Alternative Chat posted her very on audible review of the previous year. It is most definitely worth a listen, but then again everything she does is worth a listen. I have to say that while I knew of her before this year, it was a few months ago that I first listened to her podcast. I have to say I am truly thankful for discovering it, because now along with several other podcasts I look forward to hearing each episode.

She brings a deeply thought out quality to the air that reminds me in many ways of NPR. I am very much an NPR junkie so I think this soft spoken and rehearsed manner suits me very well. In the podcast she has declared that 2014 will be the “Year of Faff”, and I wholly support this notion. Before her I tended to view “faffing about” as a generally negative thing. Now I have embraced my inner faffitude and find myself doing odd little things on a regular basis. I look forward to seeing what directionless madness comes form this new venture.

Caroling in Ulduar

Early in the week my good friend Rylacus, and the warden of House Stalwart while I was away… asked me if I would be willing to do an Ulduar run. He needed a single meta achievement to get his 25 man proto drake. I told him initially that I was not sure if I would be around, but if I was most certainly I would help out. I have had both the 10 and 25 man versions of the drake for quite some time, but as I know the achievements pretty well I am always willing to help out. Since last night ushered in yet another icebound weekend here in Oklahoma, I was most definitely available for faffing about in Ulduar.

My only requirement was that we try and get EVERYONE that came along their drakes. No one seemed to mind and as a result we filled the ranks with tons of folks hopefully seeking their own. Additionally we managed to knock out Algalon, who’s room is pictured above. Most of the achievements quite honestly were pretty easy at 90, or at least easy if you knew what you were needing to do. Yog’Saron of course takes a few tries mainly to remember exactly what we need to do. The three of us that went into the portal went insane because we could not remember how to exit. We then proceeded to murder everyone else in the raid.

After that little set back we pushed forward and got him on the next try earning everyone on their drakes. Currently the only really annoying meta achievement is the “kill 25 dwarves with razorscale” one. Initially we had this idea of just gathering up all of the dwarves and letting Razorscale enrage… theoretically killing them all. This would in theory kill us all, but we should have also gotten the achievement at the same time. Two things we found out… firstly the enraged flame breath is still not enough to kill a dwarf that is sitting at full health. Secondly we can easily survive the enraged form and ended up going four rounds after that in order to get all the dwarves.

Desperately Seeking Weapon

While I managed to walk away with some really cool transmoggy bits and two pieces of the tier 8 set, I did not further my overarching mission of finding some weapons for my shaman. Granted I didn’t really expect to do so in Ulduar, but the Heroic Scenario that we ran beforehand proved both painful and fruitless. My hope is today that I can finish running Siege of Orgrimmar and that the loot gods will smile on me and let me win the axe that can drop in the final part. If this continues to prove futile I may just run Throne of Thunder as well. I need to farm up the magical happy luck coins so I can turn them into extra roll chances for Siege, but I do not have the stockpile on my Shaman that I have on my other characters. Other than this… I am going to try my best to stay warm and hopefully continue having power since the entire world outside is coated in an inch of ice.